I had an interesting conversation on Twitter yesterday that prompted me to write this post because there is an important Twitter and life lesson to be learned from it.
Tadeusz Szewczyk aka Tad Chef aka @onreact_com who has an SEO blog and writes for the Search Marketing Firm SEOoptimize sent me these Tweets that included a link to his post on Twitter Netiquette:
While I DO agree with most of his points in that post, there is one very good reason why my Twitter feed is not Burger King so everyone can’t have it “their way”:
You can’t please 16,578 people and counting so you should not even try!
One of the major problems in our relationships and world peace is that almost all people expect everyone else to do everything “their way” – not realizing how many very different ways others see the world.
As more and more people realize that everyone can NOT have things their way, life will be more pleasant. We all need to be far more tolerant and easy-going – especially about small stuff – and as the saying goes, “It’s all small stuff”.
We need to realize we can NOT have what we personally would prefer because:
- For every person that thinks something is too much there are just as many who think something is not enough – like Tweets or links
- Believe it or not no one can read your mind
Most people are NOT intentionally doing things to annoy you. The majority are totally self-focused and everything they do is what they feel is best FOR THEM.
“You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you
if you realized how seldom they do.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt ~
Those who are doing what is best for the many like me still can not do things “your way” because:
- We need to focus on what is best for all of our followers and not just you.
- We can’t read your mind so we could not do what you feel is best for you even if that was our greatest desire.
- Even if you send us a great post on Twitterquette we can’t be sure exactly which of your points was what caused you to send it to us.
- There are NO hard and fast rules for ANYTHING – and that includes Twitter.
- While having rules might make those who want to control what everyone else does feel better, just like laws they can and will be disregarded by many.
The only way to not offend anyone is to do nothing – and hide to make sure no one notices you’re doing nothing because if they do there will be those who complain because of that.
Few realize that there is no consensus on best practices for much of anything. That is especially true if they tend to choose peers and friends who are much like themselves.
One of my close collaborators and Social Media expert Kristi Hines wrote a point-by-point rebuttal in the comments of Tad’s Twitterquette post that is worth reading because it includes some excellent advanced strategies and insights on using Twitter.
That is why I often do polls like my Spam or Not Spam poll that shows why using crowd-sourcing for Akismet will never work. I bet most bloggers think “everyone knows what spam is”. Guess again!
Bloggers definition of spam ranges from “any comment I don’t like” to “any comment from someone I don’t already know” to “any comment that links to a business” to “I might approve something IF I like it”.
You might notice that I often use “we” instead of “I”? That is because many of us collaborate and brainstorm best practices live every day in chat or Skype. I do not go by only my opinion on things. I bounce them off my most trusted collaborators.
Here are some comments from chat changed to protect the innocent and not reveal who said what:
- Ah, so you should probably just change your entire Twitter engagement then so he doesn’t have to see something he doesn’t want to see…LOL
- Seriously, one follower… got to make them happy…
- GrowMap:That’s kind of what I was thinking…hmmm…like I knew what it was he didn’t like (he tweeted a post to me asking me to stop “shouting” at him)
- Um, totally don’t understand what that means…Unless he’s not a fan of caps and he took offense to the GREAT ADVICE tweet…that would be silly [NOTE from GrowMap: I've started calling attention to key tweets by adding RECOMMENDED: or MUST READ: or GREAT ADVICE at the beginning of them - and received thanks from several for doing that so they don't miss those.]
- Oh, maybe #7… he doesn’t like reality… That must be the problem…
- GrowMap: That was what I thought at first – but then I realized he more likely meant I tweet too much OR he doesn’t like to see bad news and I’ve tweeted too much reality for his tastes lately
- Maybe he wants to live in fairy bubble land where only fluffy bunnies hop merrily around a grassy field
- Damn you for spreading reality into his world of sunshine!
- GrowMap:You’re cracking me up
- It’s my comedy hour of the day
- I guess everyone has their different offense-o-meter
- No acceptance of uniqueness
- GrowMap:People actually think that each and every person on the planet should do things exactly how they want them – and expect that we could read their mind and know that is
- Well, at least this guy knows what the real problem on Twitter is… not everyone is following his rules. Good to know!
- No kidding… I quite like people who share lots of links a day. And their older articles I might have missed.
Each of us must decide how best to accomplish what needs to be done. If we wish to be effective we may choose to heed some advice from people like Scobleizer. I highly recommend reading his very entertaining post about breaking Twitter rules.
Twitter netiquette rules are GUIDELINES
NOT worth getting all stressed out over!
Also believe the good advice offered by Guy Kawasaki in his posts How to Avoid Twitter Cluelessness and How to Pick Up Followers on Twitter. Read his How to Change the World post to better understand WHY we need to be effective and influential wherever we are active including Twitter.
Yes, I do believe we must always be aware of what we are doing and how it affects others. Yes, I do believe we should do our best to limit flooding the Twitter timelines of followers who don’t use it the way I do when we can.
Click Image for B2B Twitter Tools
Click Image for B2B Twitter Tools
TWITTER TOOLS NEEDED:
We need tools like CoTweet, HootSuite, Simplify360, MarketMeSuite and others to provide us with a better way by automating our activities into rolling updates that put a time delay between tweets that we can adjust from minutes to hours to maybe even days.
We could use a way to tweet and RT the same tweet from multiple accounts and have the tool randomly change when those tweets are sent through.
ATTN: DEVELOPERS: We need these specific Social Media tools. If you have a tool we should see or are willing to build one, our group of Social Media Influencers are willing to alpha and beta test, provide detailed feedback and promote it for you in exchange for use of the tool.
We are all still developing best practices and have varying degrees of expertise using Twitter. The link section below will assist anyone at any level to greatly increase their Twitter skills and influence.
Image Credit: Detrans.DeviantArt.com
TWITTER BEST PRACTICES:
- How to Get Started on Twitter
- Use Twitter Lists so you can find what you want and still follow those who follow you – and why you should
- How to Use Twitterfeed for a consistent Twitter presence
- Strategy for getting more Twitter followers interested in YOUR niche
- Better Twitter Retweets
- Twitter Tools for Managing Multiple Twitter Accounts
- Geo-targeting Twitter – also see How to Use Twellow
- CRITICAL for BLOGGERS: Put Your Twitter UserName on your BLOG!!!!
NEW:I pulled all those together in one post: Twitter Best Practices
People who are influencers on Twitter and who write blogs can create a better world for us all. If you’re serious about being influential I encourage you to contact me and to follow the other influencers I linked to in my Small Business Advice post.
If you are offering services to small businesses and would like recommendations contact me and see my post on priorities for Small Business Internet Marketing.
TIP to get the most out of my posts: I use links throughout my post to offer additional information. Anything underlined in blue text is a link. Point at the links and you will see a pop-up also called a mouse-over that contains additional information on what is at each link. As you read, use right-click > open in a new tab so you can read all the information of interest to you from each post.
{ 24 comments… read them below or add one }
Twitter: WebMAOhist
September 14, 2011 at 8:39 am
I came here being sent by Mr. (not sure how to avoid familiarity and sound excessive tense/offical) Gail
My comments to some of blogs appeared to be “awaiting moderation” during 1-4 days. I tried to enter into contact, having tweeted to indicated author twitter accounts, with inquiries getting no response for 1-4 days while their twitter showed new tweets in each 15 min(well, from 15 min. to to 0.5-6 hours) periodicity after my unanswered tweets.
Have I known that my comments and tweets be ignored, I would not have wasted my time for communication and writing tweets.
I also consider such practices deceptive and this my belief has nothing to do with tastes, likes-dislikes or suiting everybody, etc.
Declaring himself anarchist is not crime but practicing anarchism is.
There are basic fundamental law norms and principles, quite obvious if not to searh fro them from ethical p.o.v.s, for example, on Deceptive or Unfair Acts and Practices
What is wrong with it and what it has to do with someone’s conveniences?
Related precluding tweets:
A_person_name is not but his @Twitter_Nick #tools,#apps,#ideology are #spam & #fraud alluring humans talking w/ mute #bots @WebMAOhist @GrowMap
OK, this twitter account might be really not account at all but embedded into it person (never had responded to me untill this moment)
What about another person that obviously tweeted (BTW, every 15 min) without even having access to her tweets?
WTF is this. Are her tweets (by bot) are destined to be read by bots?
Is there any lack of information or search engines on the internet to spam social networks?
I’m not against the bots. The internet is really conglomeration of bots.
But is social network purpose for bots news feeds?
Shouldn’t be there distinguishing identification of human vs. non-human communication in social networks?
Or how are humans supposed to communicate?
De-LIaR-ious WebMA$Oist COnsPYwRIGHTor with Multiple Nym Disorder Syndrome would love you to read ..The Google+’s Nym Probe – Isn’t it a Scam to Change Agreements Unilaterally and Retroactively?
Twitter: GrowMap
September 15, 2011 at 3:38 am
Hello,
Even though I do not have Akismet installed in this blog, there appears to be a WordPress related blacklist that you have landed on OR perhaps there is something about this particular comment that landed it there.
You are making assumptions about when someone “should” have moderated your comments or answered your tweets that are inappropriate because it is not anyone’s purpose in life to be doing what you want them to do.
That so many people believe the world revolves around them is a common issue and growing worse by the day. Has it not occurred to you that someone might be too busy to answer you within four days? What if they have 21,000+ followers and many of them are waiting for answers – or they have client work or high priority issues they are dealing with such as elderly parents, small children, personal emergencies or health issues?
Why do people believe that someone they don’t even know owes them something? They assuredly do not.
Using mixed upper and lower case the way you do is going to make some people wonder if you’re not quite stable and they may avoid answering you hoping not to provoke you.
If you actually read my tweets or blog consistently you would know that MANY of the my favorite Twitter users and I schedule tweets in advance just as we can schedule when our posts publish. That a tweet goes out DOES NOT mean the person is actually on Twitter at that moment.
Let’s say you ARE on Twitter and I send you a tweet but you have an appointment and are already late. Should I be offended that you did not immediately answer?
I hate to disappoint you, but the world is not fair, Google can NOT be trusted (nor can any other multi-national corporation) and no one owes anyone else anything.
We all do what we can with what time and resources we have available and should be grateful when someone else shares some of their most valuable asset: their time.
growmap would love you to read ..Are You Accidentally Exposing Your Twitter Account to Hackers?
Twitter: WebMAOhist
September 15, 2011 at 7:41 am
Gail,
thanks for your information and response!
It is not the disappearence of a single comment that bothers but that many my comments from different Emails (and different authentication methods – Twitter, Facebook, OpenID, etc.) disappear.
I think it is because my IP-address is blacklisted. And I cannot do anything with this. Before, I had grey/dynamic IP-address. Because it was blacklisted, I started to pay for a white/static one that happened to be already blacklisted before I started to use it.
It is the right of anybody to respond at the time of his convenience but I talk about my comment being dumped 4th day without any response from the owner of blog whose twitter account is tweetting non-stop without responding to human communication for days.
And today, 8 hours ago, I’ve got a response:
@GrowMap Hey @WebMAOhist are you looking for me? This is Ron from @affiliatexfiles clearly not a #bot but a living breathing person
And, again, no response (to my tweet repeating what I already wrote days before) and tweets – to whom? why? who needs them?
Is it an answer (in 3 day) from a human responding a few previous concrete inquiries about my dumped comment?
For me, it is not.
It is that kind of generic suiting any topic answers about nothing that bots use for communicating with humans
It is his right and it is my right to consider him a bot.
I just do not understand with what are you arguing and why?
He has the right to bot communication and I have the right to consider this communication to be botted
[This comment rescued from spam folder - going there even though this blog does NOT have Akismet installed.]
De-li(a)r-ious WebMA$Oist Conspywrightor with Multiple Nym Disorder Syndrome would love you to read ..KeyCAPTCHA Scam – How to Make Spam Unavoidable
Twitter: GrowMap
September 15, 2011 at 4:01 pm
Hello,
Ah, I see the issue more clearly now. By definition, Internet bots (short for robots) are “programs that can perform simple and repetitive tasks faster than human workers”.
Since I know Ron is a human because we chat daily I know that he is NOT a bot (i.e., not a computer program) generating replies to you. I asked him and he is not running any bots but, as I mentioned before, he like I and many others DO feed quality content into our Twitter accounts and THAT is apparently what you are considering “to be botted”.
Bots use programs to actually REPLY to specific words as though they were human. Feeds do not. They simply add content over time.
Many people who are very busy with client work do not hang out on Twitter waiting to answer anyone including me. That is why I use instant messaging to communicate with Ron – and even there I don’t expect instant answers.
I suspect that there are different levels of blacklists used at WordPress and that your comments have landed you on the most severe of them so that your comments go directly to spam even in blogs that have deleted Akismet.
I have an alternative viewpoint for you to think about: a psychiatric label provides someone with a way to rationalize that whatever happens is never their fault. (Example: your static IP address was ALREADY blacklisted – it couldn’t be because of the comments you are leaving even though anyone who comments frequently can end up blacklisted without reason – and since your comments are confusing many will click spam in a heartbeat)
Having a label, people feel they have a license to behave badly any time they choose and expect others to overlook it “because” they are bi-polar or have Multile Nym Disorder syndrome or any other made-up descriptions of why people act the way they do.
I consider them excuses for choosing to be selfish and wanting to have things your own way regardless of how they affect others. That doesn’t fly with me any more. I am often tempted to suggest that people acting unsociably simply “grow up”. You’re not four any more and even those who say nothing WILL tune you out and start AVOIDING you – (which of course you will never choose to believe has ANYTHING to do with how YOU have conducted yourself).
Most people – wisely – will not engage the way I am because people like this can often become physically dangerous to others when they don’t get their way. The more intelligent the con, the more damage they can do.
I know you like a challenge, but been there – done that – and while I will engage you as long as you are semi-reasonable I do sometimes block and delete those who can’t see the light. I will call it like I see it.
growmap would love you to read ..Twitter Study: New Data: How To Get More Clicks, Retweets and Followers
I also feel that initially tweeting is best but if my clients want more information the characters are insufficient to convey all the points so from there I move to either calls or emails. It has been that way since I first started using twitter and I’m habituated with this so I’m not sure whether I’ll even use other twitter tools or not
Ryan Ward would love you to read ..110 Dove Ct – Featured Listing Video
Twitter: authopublisher
March 11, 2011 at 10:25 am
I must often console myself that I cannot please everybody as my addition to lists decreases. I can’t please everybody. True.
Self Publishing Blog would love you to read ..Self Publishing- Monetization Method Most Bloggers Miss!
Twitter: Idea_Apps_Inc
March 10, 2011 at 1:17 pm
Does anyone else find the 140 character limit hard to achieve? I have clients that ask me questions all the time on twitter and I have to figure out how to cut it down to 140 characters! I typically go over hand have to revise. Also, doing business on twitter, does anyone else find it hard to take the conversation out of twitter and into email? I would prefer the initial meeting in Twitter and then move on to longer explanations in email or phone conversations. But there are many who prefer to stay in Twitter. Any thoughts?
Twitter: GrowMap
July 25, 2011 at 11:44 am
Hello,
What I do is encourage them to take the conversation to Skype or IM so I can give answers that are never going to fit on Twitter. If they insist on staying on Twitter you’ll probably have to use DM instead of @ messages to avoid filling up your Twitter stream and annoying your other followers. Sometimes I answer publicly if I feel many others will be interested – other times I take it private.
growmap would love you to read ..Merchant Accounts: What They Are and How They Benefit Your Business
Twitter: sprike_ltd
March 9, 2011 at 9:50 am
I love the use 0f Twitter, it has helped generate a lot of traffic to my website and make a lot of connections and opportunities. I would like to embrace twitter for creating a such a great app for mobile phones too!
Twitter: netaccountant
March 9, 2011 at 3:23 am
True, the more people that follow you the greater the “expectation pool” will be and you can’t please everyone.
If the comments were made because you used caps to make it clear that the Tweet were RECOMMENDED: or MUST READ: or GREAT ADVICE, may be using brackets [] around [RECOMMENDED] or even lowercase [recommended] might help.
Leo would love you to read ..Are you talking to me 6 reasons why using an auto DM to thank a new follower is a BAD idea
Twitter: GrowMap
March 9, 2011 at 4:26 am
Hi Leo,
It is hard enough to fit something intelligible into 140 characters without adding two extras. You can’t please everyone so you have to just do the best you can.
growmap would love you to read ..GrowMap Anti-SpamBot Plugin Testimonials
Every point you mentioned about tweeter is great collection …i never read such a useful post about tweeter
Twitter: Minbani
March 7, 2011 at 1:29 am
There were many good points made by the commenter’s above.
I am amazed at the seeming disappearance over the past few years of the word “tolerance”. Why is it that so many of us will “no longer put-up with” anything that doesn’t personally suit us? Why should we even begin to think that everything in this world needs to suit us? Or is geared for our liking?
What in the world makes us think it should be?
Lack of tolerance towards others as well as frustration at this brave new world we are all coming to terms with seems to be driving people beyond “tweetiquette” so tolerance towards everyone else is needed even more than ever!
Twitter: GrowMap
March 9, 2011 at 4:29 am
Hi Jan,
I guess it has been the “me” generation too long. The strange thing to me is that almost nothing is to anyone’s liking so I don’t know how they got that way. There are many serious issues that I would want to change before I would care about anything trivial like how someone else Tweets.
Everyone needs a big dose of more tolerance!
growmap would love you to read ..How to Build a Successful Blog Based Business
Twitter: DennisEdell
March 5, 2011 at 12:12 pm
Far too many people are worried about EVERYONE liking them; it’s not gonna happen. Just honestly be yourself, whatever that happens to be, and people will fall where they may.
Dennis Edell would love you to read ..Should Guest Bloggers be Responsible for Their Own SEO
Twitter: GrowMap
March 9, 2011 at 4:30 am
LOL…absolutely true Dennis. Anyone who wants me to change to be more to their liking will have a very long wait. In my very young days I tried that once and I found out that the more I changed the more he wanted me to change and no matter how much it would have never been enough.
Not a good idea.
growmap would love you to read ..Kikolani Blog Post Promotion Ultimate Guide Ebook
These are really great points about the twitter and you presented the anatomy of twitter in this post.
Great points. And you’re exactly right. We should stop caring about what others think about us because chances are they’re sooo self absorbed and wondering about their salvation, happiness, fulfilment, etc.
Henway would love you to read ..Discover Card QA
Twitter: WomanMomFriend
March 4, 2011 at 8:52 pm
WOW what an insightful twitter lesson this has been! Your conversation concerning “don’t shout” quite hilarious! Breaking twitter rules was for certain worth clicking, a very entertaining read, thank you!
The best point of all PUT your Twitter name on your blog!!! OMG thank you for saying it!!! I hate to RT a post without @whomever. This is frequently the case with many of the food blogs I visit. I mean I love my foodie blog friends but why have a twitter button if you don’t use Twitter.
Maybe it bugs me so because I like Twitter and try to stay up with my RTs and conversations there.
Have a great weekend!
redkathy would love you to read ..Funny Friday – Women and Cigars
Twitter: GrowMap
March 9, 2011 at 4:33 am
Hi Kathy,
That is why I wrote that post – so I could send it to all the bloggers – and there are many very experienced bloggers who are active on Social Media but never thought to put their username on their blog.
Now you can just send them a link to that post like I do – or ask me and I will. Even if they don’t realize how important it is I want them to benefit from their @username being in the reviews I – and others – do for them.
growmap would love you to read ..How to Monetize Your Blogs
Twitter: Byanofsky
March 4, 2011 at 8:03 pm
Some great point you brought up. I actually had one lady get angry at me in person saying I spammed her. I said, “Did I send you a direct message or @ reply?” “No,” she said, “But I kept seeing your messages and don’t want to see them.”
I think a lot of people don’t understand how to use Twitter, and a lot of frustration stems from that.
Brandon Yanofsky would love you to read ..Why am I giving a 500 service away for free
Brandon, that amazes me that someone actually qualified spam as seeing too many tweets from a person. There’s a simple solution to that– the unfollow button!
Anyway, difference in opinion is a positive thing, not a negative. No one can please everyone, but we should make a self conscious effort to be more tolerate of those whose opinions differ from our own.
Mark would love you to read ..Blogging for Restaurants and Hotels- What Do I Blog About
Twitter: GrowMap
March 9, 2011 at 4:35 am
ROFLOL Now that is a first – I haven’t had anyone say that yet but now that I think about it I’m surprised I haven’t. MANY people using Twitter have NO IDEA how Twitter works.
Even those of use who use it all the time have to test to see which tweets are seen by whom when.
growmap would love you to read ..Local Search Directory Listings
Twitter: Idea_Apps_Inc
March 4, 2011 at 1:01 pm
Everyone is different and that should be celebrated! I use to twitter to reach out to clients, meet other people I wouldn’t other wise be able to meet around the world. I like to embrace twitter and understand that each of us is different and that is a really good thing!
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